Parenting Defiant Teens

If you’ve been researching defiant teens programs, then you may be confused by all the options. In this article you’ll learn about the three types of programs available, so you can get help for your teenager as soon as possible.

Before we look into the different programs, let’s take a look at parental guilt. Many parents feel bad that their teens can’t seem to respect or get along with others. These parents feel like they have failed their children somehow, but dealing with troubled teens is an area of expertise that is usually the domain of trained professionals. Since feeling guilty doesn’t help the situation and can actually prevent parents from taking action, this does not serve you or your child.

Researching defiant teens programs and finding the one that is the proper fit for your teenager will assure that your child gets much needed treatment. It is crucial to do the research and then follow through because rebellious teens usually do not get better on their own. In fact, delaying treatment can make things worse as your child grows in strength, size and confidence when rebelling against authorities. In fact the research shows that chronic teen defiance can lead to criminal behavior in adults.

The most expensive of the defiant teens programs is teen boot camp. This is typically considered a drastic measure because the child is sent away so that others can deal with him to create a behavioral turnaround. Although most parents who take this route feel that they have no other options, it’s important to recognize that for teens, this often feels like an abandonment. While camp counselors are prepared to deal with this common issue, it’s important that you consider its impact on your child.

While there are many effective teen boot camps, some use techniques to turn kids around that might be considered questionable or even abusive. Teens have become seriously dehydrated or even died in these camps and even though such instances are rare, it pays to do your research. Find out about the techniques used and the basic philosophy behind the program. Although these camps need to have strict rules and consequences to turn around troubled teens, they do not have to put kids in danger. Also since these camps can be expensive, make sure to find out exactly how much it will cost (including any hidden costs or extras) and factor this into your decision.

The next possibility is to get a therapist who specializes in dealing with troubled teens. Go to the school counselor or your pediatrician or family doctor and ask for recommendations because not all therapists are cut from the same cloth. It takes a smart therapist to break through the defenses of a troubled kid. Make sure the therapist uses a cognitive-behavioral style which means that he or she will use techniques to create measurable changes in behavior.

Like boot camp, therapy can be expensive. Sessions can cost anywhere from $100 to $300 per hour. Since it takes awhile to figure out the best way of dealing with troubled teens who may be resistant to treatment, it is reasonable to assume that your child might require weekly visits for anywhere from six months to one year. Check with your insurance company to find out how many sessions your policy allows, so you can figure out what your share of the total costs will be.

Since many insurance policies only allow for up to ten therapy sessions per year per person, therapy might not be an option for some families. This is why many parents use an at-home behavioral program instead. These programs come with CDs and a workbook and teach the parent step-by-step how to turn around a defiant kid.

The benefit of taking a do-it-yourself approach to helping your teen is that number one, you will learn how to deal with your teen and not have to rely on experts outside the family. (The makers of many of these at-home programs do have toll free numbers that you can call when you have questions about how to use the techniques in their programs.)

Second, you will learn how to motivate real changes in your teen’s behavior. This is powerful because as your teenager starts to realize that you are helping him create a better life, his respect and appreciation for you will grow.

Third, the act of helping your teen learn how to help himself will strengthen your bond and make your relationship much more satisfying. Plus, you’ll learn a lot about motivation and personal change as well.

For many parents, out of all the options for defiant teens programs, this makes the most sense because it puts them at the helm and is both effective and affordable.

Laura Ramirez is an award-winning author and family advisor who helps parents find defiant teens programs and cope with other family issues. Read her review of the Total Transformation program, an at-home behavioral program for the parents of troubled teens that was designed by a therapist who understands the process from the inside out because he was once a troubled youth himself.